Since the cut I became uglier,

older

There is a new line in my face

grey hair grew out of my head

 

I saw it in the bathroom mirror the other night

I fall asleep later and wake up earlier

 

I have always seen darkness in life

‘Pessimist’ you would say, ‘no, realist’ I would say

and you would laugh and fall in my arms

 

But now I don’t trust anymore

I don’t even trust no more

 

Once I did

and trusted in us together

I was a natural being, falling free towards the gravitational centre point of unconditional love

In full experience of the complete human condition

Floating through all there is to feel

 

I said to myself I had been bitter before

It had been justified to love unconditionally

I said to myself I had been a heartless fool

as I felt connected to all of humanity

 

And it was all real

And so I trusted in us with a full heart

And we unveiled appeasing signs that gave away our fate

as if they had been hidden behind curtains of denial before

 

And then you blew us apart

‘We’ became ‘you’ and ‘me’

and then you became you and someone else

and I became me alone

 

and you go on and fool yourself, again

you float through all there is to feel, again

and the appeasing signs are unveiled by hands, again

 

I have always seen darkness in life

‘Pessimist’ you would say, ‘no, realist’ I would say

and you would laugh and fall in my arms